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This evening we got the two bigger kids to bed and made Crispy Turkey Cutlets with Bacon-Cranberry Brussels Sprouts [recipe]. All of the children seem to be in some stage of illness of the cough/ sore throat/ fever variety, which is less than good. Also C, our lady guest, appears to have broken her toe on our radiator. It looks mightily awful, that’s for sure. Oh dear. Baby N currently sounds a little bit like a seal when she cries, and Little A is coughing every couple of minutes, poor wee thing.

Tonight’s recipe sounded to us like a canteen version of Christmas dinner (UK) or Thanksgiving dinner (USA), but we were surprisingly very impressed. As a child I’d always have to try a little of everything on my plate, and I would dread the annual Christmas sprout sampling with a vengeance. I have never enjoyed sprouts and would never willingly eat them. So without this project, we would never ever have made this meal. However, for the first time in my life I can say that I willingly ate a plate of sprouts, and actively enjoyed them. The sprout, onion, thyme, bacon, chicken stock, parsley, dried cranberry combination is a winner, I’m sold. The seasoned, floured, egged, breaded, fried turkey cutlets were excellent; crispy on the outside, succulent on the inside. If we weren’t all set to cook a Christmas turkey, I would actually seriously consider adopting this meal as an easy dinner solution. What a pleasant surprise. And other than the cleaning of the many bowls used in the turkey breading production line, this was easy to make and easy to clean up.

Tomorrow we will be having Danish Christmas dinner with roasted duck stuffed with prunes and apples, served with caramelised potatoes, red cabbage, and other delights, courtesy of L. Presumably then, for lunch we will be having Fresh Tomato and Basil Chicken over Super Creamy Polenta, courtesy of Rachael Ray. Let the eating season begin. We may well end up snowed in anyway, we may as well insulate ourselves.

Last night I fell asleep in Baby N’s room while nursing. I woke up just before L got up to go to work and I have absolutely no idea how long I’d been asleep. I can’t remember ever being this tired. I literally nodded off while sitting with Little A and nursing the baby this afternoon. How I love that head rolling asleep, head jerking awake thing. I was probably dribbling too. This morning I took the girls out to an indoor play area thing with a cafe attached. The website promised espresso drinks, comfortable seating and free wifi. I somehow imagined a kind of calm adult area with excellent caffeinated beverages and perhaps delicious classy chocolates. The conversation, it would be flowing; the kids, happily playing in an adjacent area, (quietly of course) would occasionally come by to say, look mummy I went down the slide, and we’d say, that’s nice dear, and go back to surfing the internet. What can I say? I am chronically sleep deprived. The reality was that it took from 7am to almost 11am for myself and the girls to be ready to leave the house. It was one of those mornings when the successful juggling of newborn and toddler needs was simply not happening, with all the juggling balls being dropped left, right and center. Maybe if I stopped trying to keep their noses clean, we’d have got out the door about an hour earlier. If we could also ditch the feeding, changing and dressing stuff, we’d have been good to go at the crack of dawn. Anyway, we drove out to this sort of strip mall in an industrial estate and entered screaming child hell. Little A was already grumpy when we got there, as was the child of my friend. The girls were given books for Christmas presents (do I need to say we’ve not even written cards yet, never mind done any shopping? We’re in serious denial) and Little A opened hers. My friends child, M, had a strop because the book was for Little A, Little A had a strop because M was trying to read the book; instant simultaneous toddler meltdown. Success. Then a friend of my friend arrived, with a crying toddler. The picture was complete. Within 10 minutes both Little A and M were in tears again because they’d been hit in the backs by bigger kids flying down the slide. Little A was exceptionally needy the whole morning and wouldn’t go on the enormous padded multicoloured structure by herself. I kept climbing up with her, to encourage her to play, then getting almost stuck in some of the narrower parts. Some of the other kids were little hellions, I’m looking at you, Jewel, and us adults were run ragged trying to keep things on course. In between times we tried to eat some disgusting microwaved spaghetti with a little sauce dusted on top, and tried to drink some pretty foul coffee. The wifi and comfy seats may have existed but unless they were in an invisible sound-proofed chamber I’m guessing they were not really relaxing. Attempting to leave was a whole other challenge, what with the running away and the refusal to put on clothes, and the removal of the wrangled-on clothes. And the running away. I feel like I have a split personality trying to steer the obstacle course of toddler moods. Adding another child to the mix has only heightened the crazy performer role. Sometimes I feel like I should just be completely silent, and perhaps mime my wishes to Little A. It can’t be any less effective than trying to reason with her when she is over-tired. By nap time (late, obviously) I was absolutely wiped out. Fortunately Baby N slept through the entire debacle, only waking the instant I climbed into bed in an attempt to slip in a stealth nap while everyone else was asleep.

This evening, just before we cooked dinner, we had our first instance of full on meltdown by both kids at the same time. Real tears all round and wails and gasps and the whole shebang. L and I looked at each other simultaneously thinking what the f* have we done? We had to laugh though, really, the volume was insanely high, and those stress levels could kill. Anyway, for dinner we didn’t make polenta, which was excellent, although the Turkey, Tomatillo, and Bean Burritos were average at best. They were easy though. Ground chicken, garlic, onion, salt and pepper and red pepper were sautéed then joined by chicken stock, pinto beans, tomatillo salsa and cilantro. The mixture was rolled into flour tortillas (badly) with Monterey Jack cheese. More salsa and more cheese topped the burritos which were finished under the grill.

Grilled cheese is always a good thing, and I am quite partial to a good fresh flour tortilla. Unfortunately the filling looked and tasted more than a little institutional. The ground turkey was very grey, with only the occasional sprig of herb and piece of red pepper to break up the monotony. As the salsa was reasonably spicy there was at least a bit of a kick to dinner, but it tasted shallow rather than rich, flavour-wise. It managed to be on the bland side, despite the spice. It’s always a little strange to cook something like ground meat without any seasonings aside from salt and pepper, and to add the flavour entirely from a bottle at the end. I would have thought that a couple more ingredients added to the initial meat mixture could have gone a long way in rounding out the flavours in this meal. Tomorrow we make it again but using ground pork and a chipotle based salasa for Pork, Chipotle, and Bean Burritos. I have to say I’m not so excited about that. Also on the not-excited about front; I’m taking Baby N for her 2 month check up in the morning. If memory serves me correctly, and I could well be wrong, I think that may be the check up where they start the barrage of injections. Fun times. Also, and finally, when did our tiny baby get to be 2 months old? And how come Little A has the ears and feet of a child? Where is my baby? What’s going on? And how can time fly by so fast when the days are so excruciatingly slow?

This evening we made Turkey Stroganoff Noodle Toss, which was pretty straightforward and tasted quite reasonable for a wintery snowy night. The recipe called for turkey cutlets, we used what seemed like turkey chicken breasts, if that makes sense. The turkey was cut into strips then fried in olive oil with the sliced onion and chopped baby pickles. Meanwhile butter was melted in the pan, the flour was whisked in, then the chicken stock added. A couple of minutes later the sour cream, mustard and tarragon were stirred into the sauce, and the pan was removed from the heat. Once the noodles were cooked, everything was tossed together, some parsley was stirred in and the dish was served with slices of pumpernickel bread.

The sauce was very good, light and delicate and not at all overly creamy or heavy. The tarragon was a delicate addition. This would have been good with a simple fish and boiled new potatoes type meal. The pickles added a decent bite, both in terms of flavour and texture. Overall, this dinner was reasonably pleasant, especially on such a cold night. Nobody ate the Pumpernickel bread at all, I felt some mushrooms would have been a more welcome addition. The turkey was sort of blah, neither here nor there. I would consider making this again, with a few additions on the vegetable front, and removing the turkey element.

Today my mum and I finally left the house to take the girls to the zoo. It was mainly ridiculously cold. We need to work on our list of possible indoor activities for the long winter ahead. This evening my mum gave Little A a beautiful wooden puzzle to join the mountain of gifts that she has received this last week. We emptied out the pieces and Little A was quite excited, then she located her one special piece and wandered off with it. As I type my mum is trying to figure out how on earth the puzzle goes back together. It has two layers and requires some sort of advanced puzzle-making degree to complete. Obviously we think our child is amazingly gifted, but maybe if we get the puzzle back together we’ll archive it and try again in a couple of years. After L and I have attended puzzle school so Little A doesn’t show us up.

Tomorrow we take mum to the airport and then we’ll eat Spiced Grilled Chicken and Veggie Pockets. On Sunday my sister in law is unexpectedly flying in, just in time to catch the first two installments of the dreaded polenta lasagne series. When I told her what we’d be eating she sounded less than excited about the menu. I have to say I can’t blame her. Well it’s Friday night and we are going to go and do the week’s grocery shop, don’t ever say that our life isn’t exciting.

Today was a monumental day in the progressing from being people with kids to being a family unit game. For, yes, today was the day that we traded in my car. My beautiful little car which we got 4 years ago with no thoughts of kids anywhere on the horizon. My lovely car with it’s pretty upholstery and fancy looking interior. My blue car which doesn’t really have room for two car seats. My car which, if truth be told, looked pretty but much like the review said “drones loudly and performs modestly”. Anyway, my car is now at a dealership where it will have the mysterious dents taken out of the bonnet, and will be sold to someone else, presumably someone without kids. And now, in our garage, right here, right now, we have sitting the ultimate family vehicle; the minivan.

I had a small existential crisis of identity driving away from my little car on the lot in our new (to us anyway) mom vehicle. How uncool I thought. What hideous upholstery. But then I started to appreciate the room, the gloriously, hugely spacious seating area. And the stereo controls on the steering wheel. And the driving experience; responsive, solid, quiet. And I found myself falling a little in love with our new white minivan. It’s not fancy, it’s not new so it doesn’t have a DVD player or a table that all the kids can sit round. But it is so much easier; the car seats fit in it, and they could be placed in so very many configurations. And we can take other passengers in the car. We are living the dream. This year we have gone from living in a condo with our one kid, sharing a parking lot with a pub and a hardware store, to having two kids, a house, a garage, and now a minivan. That’s progress. For better or worse, we are certainly progressing.

I wrote yesterday that the Boo-sotto [recipe] was created by Ms Ray for her dog who needed a balanced diet of carbohydrates and protein. I alluded to the fact that perhaps the dog was spoiled for having human food rather than dog food. I hadn’t realised just how much this was the case; the recipe link above says the dog got a burger at the drive-through each time they visited. I’m not judging, but our cats have a most unfortunate diet of cat food. From a bag, although sometimes it’s chicken flavour and other days tuna, so it’s not like they’re not lucky. Anyway, we were expecting a reasonable risotto which also happened to be enjoyed by Rachael Ray’s dog.

What we got, however, was summed up perfectly by L when he twisted his face after tasting dinner and said “this tastes just like dog food”. Interestingly enough, a search on the internet revealed this quote from an interview in USA today

Q: What does your food magazine offer that others don’t?

A: Well, there’s a pet feature in every issue; don’t think you’ll find that in other food mags. We offer recipes, such as a canine risotto with organic chicken stock. We call it Boosotto, named after my late pit bull. I love animals, and I think they should also be able to eat well and healthy, too.

So, that maybe explains why our risotto tastes a little canine, perhaps. L cooked dinner while I fed the Baby so I’m not entirely sure of the process, but it is detailed in the recipe link above. I must say I was extremely surprised when the bowl of food was placed before me and it was entirely lacking in vegetable matter except for the pesky onions, garlic and parsley. My initial reaction was where were the peas? The mushrooms? Something? Then I tasted it- why oh why would you bolster an already dry and flavourless risotto with barley? Because it just isn’t bulky enough? Because you want to make sure that the recipient of the dinner would most definitely plummet to the ground in a sink or swim situation? This meal was like eating warm sleeping bag padding or soggy cat litter. The anaemic-looking ground turkey with the beige rice and barley just added yet more bulk. And the flavour was as horrible as the texture. Blandy mcbland with cheese and pepper. No thanks.

L immediately put his bowl down and went to make a sandwich. I was hungry enough that I asked L to put peas and ketchup in my bowl, in an attempt to make the food more edible. Alas, it was still vile, now it just tasted like the “food” I would make in my student days. Cardboard pulp with peas and ketchup, anyone? So we are super-excited that we have four more days of risotto, yummo. Tomorrow at least there is booze and vegetable matter in Scotch and Wild Mushroom Risotto. Surely it can only get better, at least there will be no barley in there.

For the first night in days, Baby N is asleep as I write this, so I should get some sleep. I forgot how utterly relentless newborn care is, what with the eating and the pooping (I have a minivan. I say poop. What happened to me?) and the eating and the pooping. Little A wanted to help tonight; she climbed into the chair in the baby’s room and said “I get food, I feed Omi”. She was really upset to find out that she didn’t have any milk. She did then hold her sister though, which was lovely. In a couple of years she can help though, she can get food and feed all of us. She just better not make dog food for dinner, surely that’s just wrong.

This evening we lost our taco-making virginity. We could have done with an illustration or a diagram of what is supposed to go where- sometimes it’s hard to follow written directions when doing a physical activity. We didn’t realise until too late that all the toppings were supposed to go in the shells on top of the meat. We didn’t leave any room so the toppings became a bizarre bargain-basement sort of side salad.

Anyway, recounting directions for making Turkey Tacos is probably highly unnecessary, but here goes. The ground turkey is browned with salt, pepper and poultry seasoning. It is joined by garlic, onion and, interestingly, chopped golden raisins (to keep the meat moist) chili powder and ground cumin. Beer/ stock is added, as is some tinned tomato sauce, and the whole shebang simmers for a while. Meanwhile, the taco shells are warmed in the oven, then the meat is spooned into the shells (not as easy as it sounds), topped with grated cheese and returned to the oven for the cheese to melt. We fabricated a taco stand with two ramekin dishes and a cookie sheet, in an attempt to keep the shells upright. Not so successful, but it sort of did the trick. The shells were to be topped with lettuce, tomatoes, pimiento-stuffed olives and salsa.

This meal was reasonable; for quick and easy it fits the bill. Exciting it is not. The raisins were a nice touch however. Their sweetness was very subtle but nicely offset the mild spiciness of the dinner. We’ve never made tacos at home before, and probably wouldn’t bother again, but the meal was certainly filling and reasonably satisfying.

I have many fascinating tales to tell of our exploits today. Some loads of laundry done. A trip to Target. Some phone calls. But alas, you will have to imagine the incredible excitement as we have a fussy baby in the house. Fussy but cute, fortunately. So, until tomorrow and the Mexican Pasta with Tomatillo Sauce and Meatballs, I bid you goodnight.

Where did the year go? Seriously, 5 minutes ago we were celebrating the new year through the medium of Scramblewiches. And this evening we heralded the final stretch of the year with Turkey and Sage Rolls with Cranberry Dipping Sauce. The process is almost identical to the chicken rolls we made yesterday, with the turkey and sage filling taking center stage. Although a laborious process, at least this part of the meal made sense. The dipping sauce threw us both for a loop. A dollop of tinned cranberry sauce (lots of lovely high fructose corn syrup disguised as a fruit product) is mixed with three times the amount of mayonnaise, and some lime juice. Cranberry sauce and mayonnaise is a particularly weird combination. To me it smelled of fruity tuna salad. We were both a little repulsed by the mayonnaise- sour cream or yogurt would be a less peculiar choice. The rolls would have been better with a good tangy cranberry sauce, one with a little bite to it, and a bucket-load less sugar product. If you want to make this meal and don’t have the ingredients on hand to make the dipping sauce, you could always add some vinegar and egg to a carton of strawberry yogurt.

Overall, this meal had the stodginess and flavours of a seasonal winter meal, but it left us both feeling a little cheated. Like yesterday, this was ridiculously hefty-tasting meal, but ultimately it failed to excite in any way. Tomorrow we make Lamb and Feta Rolls with Cucumber-Mint-Yogurt Dipping Sauce, which sounds much more appealing.

This evening we had a “discussion” while preparing Buffalo Turkey Burgers with Blue Cheese Dressing. Said “discussion” revolved around our plans for getting someone to take care of A, and getting me to the hospital when I go into labour, given that L works 60 miles away from home, and our hospital is about 20 miles away. Given that this baby is officially classed as full-term in 3 days (37 weeks) you might think that we’d have plans in place. Oh no we don’t, but we will, soon. Be wary anyone who I may invite for coffee in the next few days… Then of course there’s the cooking thing. Maybe we’ll end up behind a day, worse case scenario, but we are going to try and carry on through. Why stop now; we’re 3/4 of the way through the year already. I must say though, I am quite looking forward to hospital food and takeout pizza, just for the novelty value.

Anyway, the meal tonight was pretty tasty and relatively straightforward. It is billed as being the burger equivalent of Buffalo wings with blue cheese dipping sauce. The wings were replaced with ground turkey mixed with grill and poultry seasonings, scallions, garlic and oil. The ubiquitous celery stick was chopped and included in the burger mixture, rather than being served on the side. The burgers were fried until cooked, then removed from the pan. The pan was wiped clean, then into it was melted some butter with hot sauce added. The burgers were then glazed in the hot sauce and served on a bun. The blue cheese (or feta, in our case) dressing was a simple mix of sour cream and cheese crumbles, spooned on top of the burger. The recipe says to serve with cloleslaw and barbeque chips. We went with what we had handy; salad.

Aside from the fact that the dressing had the consistency of make-your-own-cottage-cheese, this burger was surprisingly good. The burger was well-seasoned (we proceeded cautiously with the grill seasoning, after learning from past experiences) and the celery offered a good bite to it. The hot sauce was an interesting addition, and the dressing was satisfying in a cold, creamy sort of way. I’m not sure that this would cure a wing-craving entirely, but it might help bring a bad craving down a notch or two. The wings we order, on the rare occasions when we get to the bar, are terriyaki wings; delicious morsels of yummy wonder (I say morsels, these wings come from the pterodactyl of the cicken world, they are enormous). But even as a not hugely enthusiastic fan of buffalo wings, I can see the appeal, and this burger certainly works.

In house news, we passed our final inspection today, and the contractor will finish up tomorrow. We are going to get the radiator installed in the kitchen so we can use our heating system- not so critical today now that it’s warmer, but we were all utterly freezing at the weekend when temperatures suddenly dropped into the 30’s. We will have a whole construction-free day, before the tiler comes back to try and make-good the bathroom bad, and to tile the kitchen splashback. One day this will all be over, we have to believe. To take our mind off things, tomorrow night we will be having Baked Sesame Eggplant Subs with Fire-Roasted Tomato and Red Pepper Sauce, which certainly sound interesting.

If you picture a damp, dark evening so cold that you feel chilled to the bone, then tonight’s meal, Chunky Turkey, Potatoes, and Veggies in Red Wine Sauce may be just the recipe that you are looking for. This is actually a very good casserole recipe which has a richness that you wouldn’t expect from something with such a speedy cooking time, but wowser it’s August. It is so wrong to be eating this now, regardless of how nice it may be. I break into a sweat just thinking about cooking meals like this.

The recipe is straightforward; boil some little potatoes and brown the turkey in some olive oil with poultry seasoning and salt and pepper. Remove the turkey from the heat once it is browned, and add thyme, onion, baby carrots, garlic, celery, mushrooms to the pan. Once they are softened, add some flour, stir for a moment then add some red wine. A couple of minutes later add the chicken stock, simmer for a few further minutes then add the cooked drained potatoes and turkey to the pan. Allow to warm through then add the parsley, adjust the seasonings to taste, and serve.

There were a couple of small drawbacks to this dish, aside from the fact that it is entirely the wrong kind of food for summer. The turkey tasted a bit like an old boot, which is never good. And the baby carrots, whilst tasting fine, were barely softened. They could certainly have benefitted from being par-boiled with the potatoes for a few minutes. However, other than that, the vegetables were tasty and the sauce was remarkably good.

In other news, the floors have been sanded upstairs in our new house and they look absolutely beautiful. Things upstairs seem like they are coming together (minus the gaping holes in the bathroom floor and walls) which is very reassuring. We will be living upstairs and outside for a while, and it seems like all our possessions will be living in boxes in the garage for a wee while. That makes more sense than piling them up inside the house for the workmen to work around. And everything should be much less dusty than if it stays inside while the work continues. The main drawback is that we need to be even more organised, presumably, which currently seems like an impossible dream. The kitchen floor is due to be poured tomorrow, in preparation for eventual tiling, with the cabinets starting to be put in place in the meantime. With our eleventy-gazillionth trip to Ikea we have finally solved our bathroom cabinet/ lighting problems so hopefully we can lay off the spending for a while. I have also finally arranged for our phone and internet to be transferred over there, but we will have a down time of about 3 days before being back on the grid next Friday. So it looks like next week we’ll cook outside or in the microwave, document the food out on the deck, and then I’ll need to find somewhere with internet access to publish a post. Fun times.

Tomorrow is one of the most repulsive-sounding meals we have had the pleasure of cooking so far this year, Oven-Baked Corn Dogs with O & V Slaw. Hot dogs in Jiffy muffin mix, mm-mmmm, can’t wait. Meantime, we had really better get packing.

This evening, after a gloriously wet, rainy and coldish day, we made Chicken or Turkey Spanakopita Burgers [recipe] with ground turkey. On the Food Network website the burgers are served with fries and a yoghurt-based dip; in the recipe book we’re following, the burger was served with chips. We have had a lot of poultry burgers with “fancy chips” this year, and this one fell somewhere in the middle, taste-wise. It’s not fabulous, it’s certainly not terrible, but it seemed like a lot of effort for yet another burger.

There is a mistake in the recipe book which is a little confusing. Half of the red onion is chopped and the rest is sliced; you are then told to fry all the onions with the garlic, which is then mixed with the meat to make the burger. At the end of the instructions you are to place the red onions on top of the burger; should they have been cooked and separated or kept separate and raw? Difficult to know, we ended up putting all the onions inside the burger, but the Food Network website does clarify that the sliced onions should remain raw.

Anyway, other than that, this is a fairly simple, if long-winded, recipe. The turkey burgers feature spinach (squeezed not towel-dried, despite instructions) and feta cheese, with grill seasoning, oregano and a drizzle of olive oil, along with the cooked garlic and red onion. As always, this mixture makes for enormous patties, each big enough to feed a small horse or a ravenous pregnant person. A tapenade-type topping is made with kalamata olives, roasted red peppers and parsley. This was supposed to be done in the food processor but it is boxed up somewhere as we have started to pack up the kitchen. Neither of us could face digging the machine out, so L chopped everything by hand into tiny weeny pieces until it was paste-like. If I had been chopping it would have been very rustic-style- ie it would have looked like it had been chopped with a spoon. The burgers were also adorned with sliced cucumber, tomatoes, shredded arugula and optional hot peppers.

The burgers were surprisingly moist, which was a great bonus for turkey burgers which have a tendency towards dryness. The toppings felt a little like eating a crunchy side-salad, which was nice. The Spanakopita element, the spinach and the feta, was overwhelmed by the meatiness of the burger. Perhaps if we’d had better feta (the blocks seem so much better than the reduced-fat crumbles, I wonder how that could be?) this wouldn’t have been a problem, and the salty goodness would have shined through. As it was, the enormous bread bun plus the mountain of meat just ended up feeling like a stodgy burger; any subtleties were unfortunately lost along the way. Tomorrow we will be modifying this recipe to make Spanakopizza, at least it is vegetarian, or so I believe.

Tomorrow brings us another day closer to moving into our own little construction zone. It’s really frustrating because all the things that we were going to do at the weekends- such as painting- can’t really be started until other things have happened. And whilst it was lovely that it rained today, it meant we didn’t go over to the new house because A wouldn’t be playing in the garden. As the inside of the house is in such a state it is ridiculously unfriendly for a curious toddler, so we just stayed away. We are starting to worry about the relative mental health of all of us when we move in, and we have extended that concern to include the cats. Moving is hard enough without having to keep them locked in one room every day while workmen are around. Thinking about how little time we have left in our beautiful and finished condo makes us really sad. And we are starting to entertain thoughts of having to cook pasta in the kettle once we do move. Must. Take. Deep. Breaths.

Late this afternoon we met a friend for coffee on her way home from work. Baby A was spectacularly cute, pretending to drink from her snack cup and saying “little coffee, mmm”. It almost made up for my blind panic this morning when I was convinced I saw a head louse crawling across her scalp. She has been scratching her head alot lately, which we think may be heat and or shampoo related, and I panicked when I got a rogue glimpse of her new mole through her hair. Suffice to say I am now suffering from sympathy imaginary hair itch. Apologies if I have just transferred that feeling to your good selves.

This evening we made Turkey Cutlets with Sautéed Brussels Sprouts with Pancetta and Balsamic Vinegar. Before I begin, I should mention again that neither of us like brussels sprouts. As a child, they were the bane of my existence; every Christmas and sporadically throughout the year I would have to “try” one or two, before I could leave the table. Every time I had to fight with myself not to gag, or cry. I hate brussels sprouts. However, this recipe sounded like it may be a reasonable way to eat the little green monsters, and some people love them so it can’t all be bad. Maybe it was just the British boil-them-till-they-drop style of sprout cuisine that was a problem. So we attempted to enter into the spirit of this dish with an open mind. The pancetta was cooked until crispy, followed by the onions and garlic. The sprouts were added to the pan with the chicken stock and balsamic vinegar, and left to simmer until soft. Meanwhile, the turkey cutlets were marinated in olive oil, lemon juice, sage, parsley, salt and pepper. They were then browned in the skillet and warmed in the oven with some chicken stock poured over the top in an attempt to keep the old-boot quality at bay. A gravy was then made with melted butter, flour and chicken stock, seasoned with salt and pepper and parsley.

The recipe calls for half a pound of turkey cutlets per person. In the packet we bought, that would mean 4 1/2 cutlets each. That is an enormous amount of turkey. Even if Ms Ray’s cutlets are thicker than ours, that is still a mountain of meat. It’s a good thing that we made far less turkey than called for; it would all have been thrown away. This is one of the rare meals we have made this year where we have both tasted it and immediately downed tools. With the possible exception of the pancetta, there are no redeeming qualities to this meal. The turkey was like an old lemon-boiled boot, with a bland institutional-tasting gravy. The sprouts were still, unfortunately, sprouts. Even sliced and fried they tasted like the boiled vegetables of yesteryear. Maybe if you like sprouts this is a good recipe, unfortunately we just can’t accurately judge that. This review has a severe anti-sprout bias, I have to admit. Suffice to say, L made us some pasta pesto for second dinner, which was nice.

Tomorrow we are making Fruited Chicken Curry in a Hurry. Even if it’s awful, and there is no reason to expect that it will be, it will be a cheaper waste of food than this evening. Tonight was an extravagant dumping of food, which is just wrong.